Author Archives: lancer

Well this week I have a chance to have a winning record. I usually stick to pro games, but this week there are a couple Big Ten matchups I cannot avoid.

1) Ohio State over Michigan State (MSU getting 14)
Well I hate to bet against the teams I like, but this appears to be foolish logic when a couple of my favorite teams are Michigan State and the Detroit Lions. OSU is coming into east Lansing ranked number one and are playing a team that has done nothing but disapoint. State has no chance of pulling anything out of this year, and thus, will be blown out at home displying their quitting attitude.

2) Michigan Over Penn State (Penn State is getting 5.5)
I was at the Penn State game against ND earlier in the year. Yes, it was at the beginning of the season, but I don’t expect the Corpse to make any changes. I hate Michigan, but I can’t get away from this spread. All Penn State has is a running game and one of Michigan’s strengths is stopping the run. I expect Michigan to win by at least a TD.

3) Eagles over the Saints (Saints getting 3.5)
Well the spreads are mixed on whether it is 3.5 or 3, but I am confident enough to take the larger. Saints are overrated, and their emotion in their home games is decreasing as displayed by barely defeating the 1-4 bucs last week. McNabb has been in MVP form this year and will give the Eagles another win


Well I will make this short and sweet…

1) Kansas City over Cardinals (Kansas City giving 3)
Arizona is starting a rookie qb and they tend to always struggle, except the Rothlessadfafhe (or however you spell his name), but he had an unstoppable running game. The Cardinals have no running game. Kansas City will win big in this one. I am very confident with this pick. In fact, Kansas city covering is just as probable as Glasser wearing a red t-shirt or Champ drinking one to many at the bar.

2) San Diego over Pitt (Pitt is getting 3)
San Diego is at home, and at this point is a better team. They should have won last week and will rebound in this game.

3) Tenn over Colts (Colts are giving 18.5)
I know Tenn blows, I mean really blows, but 18.5 is a lot in any pro game.

As NBA Jams would say “He’s Heating Up.”

1) Minnesota over Buffalo. Minnesota is getting 1
I know a home team gets a few points, but we are still talking about the Bills. I home team usually gets about 3 points for being at home, but it isn’t even snowing in Buffalo yet. Minnesota just barely lost to Chicago, and are apparently a good team with this new offensive line. Buffalo is not as bad as everyone expected, but I think they are a few years behind the Vikings.

2) Cincinnati over the Pats. Pats are getting 6
I am going to continue to ride the Cincinnati wagon even though I dislike them because I am constantly killed by Carson Palmer in my fantasy football leagues. but, i mean they just went into Pit and beat them by 8, and I would have to think the Steelers are better than the Patriots, especially after the horible display at home on a Monday Night game.

3)Wisconsin over Indiana. Indiana is getting 11
I hate picking college teams because they seem to be so unreliable from week to week, but I like this line. The Badgers will rebound after a tough lost in Michigan and will stomp on Indiana.

Well this is the time it all turns around. It appears my job is in jeopardy and it is time to bring in my A game.

Editor’s Note: Click read more if you really, really want to. I mean, these locks are 1-5 in two weeks. So, uh, take these at your own peril. Also, in the interest of full disclosure, in informing me that his picks were in, Lance told me, “not confident about steelers one”, this could be an interesting week to say the least…

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Editor’s Note: In the following post, lance makes a LOCK OF THE YEAR and then says if it fails, the creators of this site will reimburse your losses…well, uh, fuck that. Motherfucker went 1-2 last week, there is not a chance that we are guaranteeing anything in this post to be anything close to a correct pick. Again, if you pick with Lance, you do so at your own potential peril.

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Every Friday I plan to post my Stone Cold Lock of the Week. Hopefully, by following my picks or choosing the exact opposite the readers can make a few bucks.

1) Chargers over Raiders (Raiders are getting 3 points)
People are high on the Raiders after an impressive preseason. However, it is merely preseason and I expect another awful year. Rivers is taking over for qb and going against one of the worse passing defenses in the league I don’t expect him to have any trouble. Plus, the Chargers always have Tomlinson.

2) Denver over St. Louis (Denver is giving 3.5)
St. Louis claims to be focusing on the run this year. I expect this strategy to go out the window as soon as they are down in the first quarter. I think Denver is just a more physical team and will like to make a statement at the beginning of the year.

3) Seattle over Detroit (Seattle is giving 6)
I hate to do it to the lions, but I expect them to lose and lose badly. Seattle may experience a brief hangover due to the superbowl loss, but the Lions have experienced a decade of consistent losing and I see no reason for this to change. Hopefully Ford will relinquish control of the football team as he did with Ford Motors and allow the fans to actually to watch a good football team.

Editor’s Note: I didn’t even have to add in that remark about going opposite of what Lance here comes up with. But, I would recommend it. We certainly don’t ask the audience to trust us often, but we go to law school with the guy. A little trust may go a long way here.