Terrell Owens and the St. Louis Cardinals had something in common last night

A week ago, Terrell Owens just had a finger injury and an ego.

A week ago, the St. Louis Cardinals had an 8 and a half game lead in the NL Central.

Last night, they both decided the hell with that and emerge this morning as a mental whack job and a team with a 1 1/2 game lead.

Terrell Owens attempted general suicide and the Cardinals, well, they’re just not giving a damn about making the playoffs. One of the two drowned their sorrows with 35 pain pills. That, was Owens. The Cardinals just can’t beat anybody right now.

That’s the Gamecocks I Was Expecting

    I was a little caught up in the debacle at Spartan Stadium on Saturday that I’m just now catching up on all the sports happenings from Saturday.  I was pleased to see that my South Carolina Gamecocks put a hurt on the proud Florida Atlantic Owls.  I realize that it is a victory over not a particularly intimidating football team but a 45-6 victory is impressive nonetheless. 

The Ride Her Cup

As most of you are aware by now I’m sure, Tiger Woods is a little bit upset with some obscure Irish tabloid for publishing photos purporting to be nude pics of his wife . . .who just happens to be a blond, sweedish super-model. The photos turned out to be of someone else, but that didn’t turn down Tiger’s temper. Nor should it. I’ve never been a huge fan of Tiger, and I often think he is acting like a child on the course but I don’t think anyone of us would take this type of thing laying down.

Final: Bears v. Lions

For those of you that were too worried about Roy Williams safety or didn’t want to be made ill by the Lions play today and didn’t tune in, I’ll try and give you a little help on the Bears beatdown of the Lions. Click the read more and you can check out my thoughts at the half and after the inevitable conclusion of the Bears making the Lions look worse than the Packers.

Way to get yours Reggie Bush

“Apparently” Reggie Bush and his family received $100,000 in benefits while he was still an “amateur” athlete at USC. You know what I say. . .more power to you Reggie. I’m fairly certain that 100k doesn’t even scratch the surface of how much money Reggie generated for the school, conference and the NCAA. I know all about the supposed evils of paying college athletes and a lot of them make sense. So while leaving out the bigger discussion of whether or not we should or shouldn’t pay college athletes and just give some props for Reggie getting his.

Fighting Gamecocks

Despite a very disappointing outing against what could only be categorized as a superior Georgia team the South Carolina Gamecocks proved they still have some fight in them. Well, at least starting QB Blake Mitchell did. Mitchell was arrested in the early hours of the morning today after a trip to a local watering hole. Mitchell was charged with simple assault which could either mean it was a bar fight or he decided to beat the shit out of a man with Down Syndrome. Albert Pujols’ representative was unavailable for comment, but we are sure he is outraged.

Monday Night Footballs

Last night was an unprecedented night for MNF as most of you probably realize, but hey for those that got here through some of our more colorful search terms let me recap.  MNF has transitioned away from its only other home, ABC, for ESPN and maybe more importantly for the continued success of the program, Cable.  Also unprecedented was the Monday Night double header.  If you’re interested in a little more discussion about MNF with little discussion of either actual game, which I completely understand if you’re not, click the read more link.

The Champ Said WHAT?

This is the first installment of a semi-regular feature here at Joboo. Periodically we’ll be checking in on everyone’s favorite common sense challenged forecaster, the Champ, and update everyone on how his predictions are looking. We know he tries to go out there for making these predictions, and for the interest of keeping the comedy flowing we’ll try not to be too harsh on the boy. If you’re interested in seeing how his first week of predictions are shaping up click that handy read more link.

The NFLs turn…

Eli v. Peyton tonight…anyone giving a damn? I love some football, but I’m not going to watch a minute of that game. Hell, I might not watch a minute of any NFL today if the Champ is so intense on the Lions game that he refuses to watch Carson Palmer (Doherty and I’s Greaty White Fantasy Hope) against Larry Johnson, even on commercials. Champ is already into degenerate gambler mode. Sweating out both the Bears/Packers and the Eli Bowl and it’s not even 1pm : “did Boomer just say the Packers have no shot?” Um, I wasn’t giving a damn, but probably. On the bright side, it leads into a Brett Favre package, so I get to check and make sure the Last button is working on the remote.

By the way, when this day ends and there is no NFL Primetime on ESPN…blame NBC. And the Mannings. Primetime is only listed for air tomorrow afternoon. Boomer and TJ are apparently still doing highlights on Sunday nights, just not calling it Primetime…this is not going to work out well.

What I’m giving a damn about today, because I’m certainly not giving enough of a damn about Business Enterprises and Criminal Procedure:

Denver at St. Louis at 1pm: Why, first game of Champ’s parlay, he says. Want to get his pain and suffering out of the way before he gets too many Bud Lights in him.

Philadelphia and Houston, this fool Mario Williams is going to kill McNabb…or, do nothing and get a lot of comments such as “Reggie Bush could have been here?” etc…As an Eagles fan, I haven’t been giving much of a damn about this season because the way I see it, either they’ll win or they won’t. By win, I mean contend for a Super Bowl…or they won’t do anything at all (kind of like last season). There won’t be a middle ground for this team, so why live or die with each game?

Tampa Bay and Baltimore interests me for some reason…I’m not really sure why. Maybe just because I want to see Ray Lewis beaking on Chris Simms.

Kansas City and Cincy is definitely the top game of the afternoon and should be very entertaining to get the season started.

It’s 12:55 and I’m just now realizing that Joe Buck is doing the FOX pre-game and James Brown is on CBS? And I learned this from the info button, not actually seeing Joe Buck on the pre-game? The games could be awful, but I’m happy to have not learned that fact first hand.

Don’t Sleep on the Gamecocks

For the second week in a row South Carolina has a primetime SEC match-up televised on ESPN (7:45 Eastern on the mothership). This is just another sign that South Carolina is a team on the rise. This is going to be a much tougher test for than last week for the Gamecocks but don’t let the 15 points scored against Mississippi State scare anyone of the Gamecocks’ bandwagon. Don’t think for a second that Spurrier was saving a few things for this week. He is that type of sneaky bastard that would sandbag against an inferior team like Mississippi State just to surprise the Bulldogs.